NWA Mexico's The Good, the Bad and the Ugly

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(La Sombra appeared for a televised parody segment filmed at a n NWAMEX house show. He's wearing a T-shirt that says "Sombra" on the front and "Who's next?" on the back. The fans start chanting "Sombra!" repeatedly.)

Sombra - I beat 200 nobodies to take this! (pats the Mexican Tag Team title belt) I managed to do more with the limited talent I had than most wrestlers do with in their entire career. I couldn't cut it in the NFL so I figured I could make it in wrestling by making myself look good by taking on all the jobbers and padding my record. With my limited mic skills, I can't think of anything to better to say than "Who's Next?".

(The fans continue to chant "Sombra" as he leaves the ring.)

[Deleted]

(Perro Aguayo Jr. is sitting in the lounge of the Mexico City Rehabilitation Center. He sees Cibernetico and Atlantis come in.)

Perro Aguayo Jr. - Hey! What are you guys doing here? Come to visit me? Well, you'd two had better leave. I'm here to get away from NWAMEX for awhile. You being here just makes it harder for me to relax!

Atlantis - Uh. We're here because we got busted.

Perro Aguayo Jr. - Busted? For what?

Cibernetico - Drug possession. You should have seen Atlantis! He was tripping out!

Atlantis - Hey, you told me it was weed.

Perro Aguayo Jr. - What was it?

Cibernetico - Crack.

Perro Aguayo Jr. - (laughing) And you couldn't tell the difference?

Atlantis - Hey, it was my first time.

Cibernetico - The police gave us a choice to go to rehab or go to jail.

Atlantis - Even this place is better than jail.

Perro Aguayo Jr. - This place ain't so bad when you get used to it. You get three squares a day. All the DVDs you can watch in a year plus group sessions with other patients.

Atlantis - What's so great about the group sessions?

Perro Aguayo Jr. - You must of had blinders on when they brought you in here. Some of the ladies are so sweet!

Cibernetico - Sounds like a good place to be.

Atlantis - I just want to get out of here as soon as possible......

[Deleted]

(Diamante, Mistico II, Rey Cometa and Rush are heading back from shopping for their Halloween costumes by taxi.)

Rush - Man, I'm glad you guys are such runts! That's the only way that you would fit in the back seat of a taxi!

Cometa - Better calm down. The taxi driver looks a bit nervous of letting you sit in the passenger's seat up front.

Rush - I know, right? He really looks nervous when we all speak in English!

Mistico II - Which is more the reason to keep speaking it!

Diamante - Hey, take it easy on the old man!

Mistico II - Hey, he's lucky that Rush didn't wear his Halloween costume!

Cometa - Hey! What's so scary about his costume??

Diamante - He's gonna look like Bruce Banner turning into The Incredible Hulk wearing your clothes!

Mistico II - and your blind dates are going to wonder what they got themselves into!

Rush - Did you have to bring that up? I just hope that they didn't set us up with Mika Shimoda and Hiroka as a joke!

Cometa - You can have Mima! At least Hiroka doesn't talk as much!

Diamante - What's so bad about Mima and Hiroka? I think they both look hot!

Cometa - Alrioght. You can take both of them to the Devil's Night party! I'll make sure you get an extra set of ear plugs for you! Not sure what would be worse for you...them speaking in English, Japanese or Spanish!

Diamante - At least if they're speaking in Spanish, I'd understand what they are saying.

Rush - Believe me, you'd regret it if you did understand what they're saying! That goes double if they lose a match! Hey, bro! How's things looking for you getting back into the ring?

Mistico II - With Perro Aguayo Jr. promoting, terrible! I think he disqualified us in our trial match just because you're my brother!

Diamante - He doesn't like your dad that much either!

Rush - The feeling's mutual on that score! Perro Aguayo Sr. himself is the only one in the whole family that isn't as crooked as a sidewinder!

Cometa - You'll get your chance to get back at Lil' Agauyo soon enough!

Rush - Yeah, the rate I'm going, the doctors won't give me medical clearance until Christmas! Here's our stop. I'll pay the taxi driver.

Mistico II - Good idea. He'll be relieved that you aren't robbing him.......

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(Atlantis is sitting in his new office in Arena Mexico. Dragon Rojo Jr., Niebla Roja y Rey Escorpion walk into the room without knocking.)

Atlantis - Is there a problem here?

Dragon Rojo Jr. - Yeah, you sending that trigger happy punk after us to get the belts back.

(They throw the Mexican Tag Team belts on the floor. Dragon Rojo Jr. and Rey Escorpion throw the California Pro Tag Team belts onto their shoulders to show them off.)

Rey Escorpion - We don't need your stinkin' belts. We're already tag champions in California!

Niebla Roja - Yeah, and we still didn't get that rematch for the screwjob the loco gringos called a title match on the last NWA PPV!!

Atlantis - Gentlemen, we can talk business in reasonable manner can't we?

Dragon Rojo Jr. - You've got five minutes to tell me something that makes me a ton of money or we walk!

Atlantis - Despite our differences, I think we can reach an agreement that we will both be happy with. NWAMEX is starting to gain popularity with each NWA PPV we participate in. I'd like you to join a world tour where we stop at a different city each week to hold inter promotional wrestling cards to gain even more popularity.

Rey Escorpion - And what does that have to do with us?

Atlantis - Well, you've done something that no other NWAMEX workers have been able to do. You have taken the tag titles of an outside promotion. I'll book matches for you. All you need to do is win matches. I won't even charge you a manager's fee.

Niebla Roja - What's the catch?

Atlantis - The only "catch" is the fans that will be hooked on NWAMEX when we're on our world tour. Are you in?

Dragon Rojo Jr. - Yeah, we're with you for now. If try you anything screwy, we'll be the ones with itchy trigger fingers!

[Deleted]

(El Terrible, Tiger and Tama Tonga find Rey Bucanero passed out on the floor of his apartment again with needles and straws all over.)

Terrible - Hey, Rey! I like to party too but what you're doing is gonna kill you!

Tonga - Yeah, and you're supposed to be our leader.

(Rey Bucanero passes out again.)

Tiger - What are we gonna do now? Who's gonna lead us?

Terrible - I nominate myself. All in favor say "Aye"!

Tonga y Tiger - Aye!

Terrible - OK..the first thing we're gonna do is get him checked in drug rehab. I hope that he stays there until he's well.

Tiger - Me too....